Get out of the spoonie drawer and be in the sun! 2

In the words of the one and only – BIG SEAN!

I’m not compromising myself in any way, I love just doing whatever I want and showing people it’s real!

Compromise by definition is an agreement or settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions.

To me this represents SPOONIE mentality to the fullest….. you wake up – feel off from “whatever” and start dictating how you are going to accomplish your day. This is an internal compromise, between you and your illness – this is when we let our illnesses own us!

What life is there with letting the negative part of yourself own you?!?

Last night was a hard night for me, by my own head… and food; I had a stressful day (which I let completely own me!) and then James and I had Tuesday Tacos….corn tortillas, street corn (duh!) and corn chips. Needless to say, this very quickly resulted in organ hardness and immediate pain.

I am already in a FLARE! SO….

STRESS = FLARES, right… Extra STRESS + FLARE = WORST MATHMATICAL COMBO EVER!

When we got home, James…. Most amazing dude in the world – ran me a bath and gave me a muscle relaxer – I was sound asleep by 830.

This morning – I still feel rough… but you know what I didn’t do?

I didn’t – think about what I could/couldn’t do today – I’m going to do everything I can today, like every other day. The minute I start compromising within myself I let my Lupus define me and own me. I refuse to let this own me!

I went to my 830AM meeting, with my bubbly personality – no one will know today that I am feeling out of sorts!

I went to the office, I have shit to accomplish today.

I will however change how I deal with the stress of the day today – I have a tendency to overthink and overstress – which is great for a Lupus survivor.

I go through all the same things as the SPOONIES, I just have no desire to allow my disease to own that much of me. To dictate that much of me. To claim that much of me.

This negative outlook breeds more stress. It also breeds a commonality amongst the chronically ill who want to wear a purple banner on their chests and be treated differently. Thank you to, itwaslupus.tumblr.com – nail on the head there.

I am a Lily of the field, as I’ve said before – I am growing strong and faithful that nothing will be thrown to me that I cannot accomplish.

Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin.

Stay out of the drawer and walk amongst the sun. Do not let yourself die before you get to live.

(-It also helps if you get yourself a James –)