I’ve said yes to the dress! Now to make the workouts count, to be my best – for my best.

I said yes to the dress, well; make that I clicked yes to the dress. Inputted my measurements and my dress is in the tailoring phase!

Though I have ordered the dress…. To my measurements on 8/30…. That is NO excuse to not keep cutting. It’s my wedding day, it’s my life, it’s my health – and I want to be my competition weight again! I feel comfortable in my skin, but I want to feel beautiful in my skin.

So I gave up the sugar, it was rough – but I no longer crave it.

I started entering everything I eat into MyFitnessPal App. It takes a few extra minutes but it helped my pop cut a bunch…. So I’m in.

The final step to this was making my workouts count. I’ve been floundering. I went through my weeks of cardio/yoga with only a little lifting – to 3 days of lifting with some cardio and yoga – to where I am today.

I’m thick.

It’s ok, it’s just a word. I’m thin waist-ed, big butted and massive thighs – I’m muscle – I’m strong. I am never going to be 102 lbs, even anorexic I’d still be thick. I’m built a lot like my poppa, I’m a brickhouse. So my workouts should tailor to that… I need to work with my body. When I was at my prime, I was lifting, doing light cardio/HIIT and no yoga 7 days a week.

I’ve morphed this a little to fit my added yoga, which is helping my body in SO many ways! If you have Lupus like me, try it! The change in my joints, the movement, the calm, the rush – it’s very exciting!

I lift 5 days a week…






I do yoga 3 days a week with YogaGlo – a great site, it’s 18$ a month; it’s AMAZING.

This takes me back to working out to compete, and golly do I miss competing. Workouts are tough, aside from my chronic pain; I still hurt like you should after a hard workout. I’ve been bruised, cut, tore, sprained, taped together, strapped together, ice bathed, destroyed…. But none of that pain compares to the feeling of winning…. Or the feeling of competing – cheering – lifting – owning your last results.

Cardio – every time I lift……………… YUCK! But it’s not like cardio bunny cardio, it’s short intervals of sprints or something else HIIT related to mix it up. Couple days ago I did 20/20 10 rounds of battle ropes and kettle bell swings (alternating) and thought I was going to DIE.

Only cardio, does nothing for this body. This body, my body was built for lifting – strength! Knowing what your body was made for and working with it, is the game changer with cutting. I’m focused…. I’m down about 7 pounds since I started this WC (wedding cut) on like 8/30.

Just a side note, I’m doing this for me – I know that James loves me regardless of how I look. He tells me I am the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen on a regular basis; he makes me blush on a daily with his sweet compliments.

Who would I be to not be my best for him?!

Trigger Warning….

I view our relationship in a very traditional way. I am his partner yes, but I serve him. James has the final say in our decisions and I trust that he makes them with OUR best interests in mind. I ask him before I do things, because I respect him – I respect his place – I respect his role.

Our first few hang outs (I guess they were dates) we discussed our values, what we were both looking for ourselves out of life, politics, religion, family and a partner. He became my best friend before I thought of him as my partner.

I want to be my best for him. Whether that be in my job, my personal life, my looks, my body or my health.

I despise when I hear girls say – no I’m not going to cut for the wedding, he loves me the way I am. Of course he does, or he shouldn’t have proposed! But what is so wrong with cutting to feel your best, be your best and look your best – for him – your partner.

James deserves the best of me, because he gives me the best of him. I want to walk down the aisle to him feeling beautiful in my skin…. I want to start our life together as husband and wife feeling fully confident and ready. I want to be healthy inside and out for the day we decide to start building a family. I’m already sick enough, having a healthy lifestyle will only help bridge that gap.

55 days, 18 hours, 16 minutes and 40 ish seconds – until I say I DO…

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